My Girlfriend is Flirting with Other Guys

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
The girl I love isn't ready to date me yet or anyone but she loves me back. But recently she has been talking to other guys and when I ask her about it she says they're just friends or she loves me and me only.

I've never really been the jealous type but I can't help it when she flirts with other guys.

Please help Advice
Your age group is 13-15 and I know how challenging young love can be. You feel strongly for her. She says she feels strongly for you - and yet she is flirting with other guys and having fun with them.

We all have different lines in life about what we think is appropriate behavior. Some couples are quite fine flirting and having fun at parties and consider it just part of life. With other couples, they don't flirt with anybody else at all. They barely talk to members of the opposite sex. They only focus on each other.

It sounds like here that she likes flirting, and you're not comfortable with the behavior. So you need to find a compromise.

Something she might want to think about is that, at that age range, the guys she's flirting with will often feel like she's leading them on. She's giving them signals that she's interested and that they have a chance of dating her, if only they lure her away from you. So her continued encouragement will keep them trying to get her into their arms and also mean they won't be spending time with girls who are actually available for dating.

If they do already have girlfriends and it's just harmless talk at lunch, that's one thing. But if they are single and interested in her, then that's not really fair to them. It's important for her to consider just what type of message she's giving to them.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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