I Have Feelings for my Ex
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I was dating this guy and I totally fell for him, but he broke up with me. I was crushed, completely destroyed but he didn't seem to care. He started dating another girl just a few days later so I cut off all ties with him.
Now I'm dating this guy I've been friends with for a while but I don't know if I really like him or if I'm still in love with my ex. I think about my ex a lot, but this feeling I have for my boyfriend is very similar to the way I felt when I started dating my ex.
I don't even talk to my ex, but I think I'm still in love with him.
I don't know what to do.
It's very common when you break up with someone to still have feelings for them, even if they were harmful to you. There are still lingering emotions that take a while to fade away.
Focus all your attention on your current guy. He deserves your full affection and interest. Over time the ex will fade away - give it that time. Yes, he was an important stage in your life, and you'll always have a sense that your time with him had meaning. But it is a past meaning.
It's like loving a puppy you had when you were six, but moving on and now adoring the horse you have when you're 20. Each love is a stepping stone towards what you will have in your present and future time period. You don't have to completely erase the old feelings - and at the same time you want to make sure your focus in current times is with your current path.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com