Two guys in the same boat

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I'm speaking on behalf of myself and a good friend of mine. You see, neither of us can get over our last girlfriends (well,truthfully, him and his girl actually dated. me and my girl were really close and had more than once admitted to having strong feelings for one another, but we were never actually a couple.) You see, his girlfriend dumped him because she was tired of waiting for him to take their relationship to the next level, an intimate level (kissing and whatnot), which he was very nervous about doing. My situation isn't quite as simple...we were like best friends, but she has horrible self-esteem and trust issues coming out the wazoo. I'm the only person she ever really felt she could trust until I started developing feelings for her. Point is, we've both done all we can to move on, but we just can't. seeing them with other guys, looking at them the way they used to look at us, even though theyre guys whom they would never actually be with (coincidentally, in both cases the guy already has a girlfriend), it kills us inside, and both of us have tried everything we could think of to win them back, all of which blew up in our faces. He actually cried, while my girl cried, punched me in the face, and then ran. It's been 3-4 months, so I feel like enough time has passed for both us to be able to try again, and I know they still feel the same way about us. Strong feelings like that don't just go away, obviously, but once again, we are clueless as to what else we can possibly do to get them back. Advice
You're lucky that you and your friend have each other for moral support. Both of you need to stop spending so much time trying to get these girls back. They've dumped you. Why would you want to have a relationship with someone who can easily treat you so badly? Three months is long enough to grieve. You and your friend sound like nice caring guys. There's so many girls out there who would love to have someone like you. Good Luck.

-- from Jill
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