Confronting the truth

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I've been with him for 3 years. I've supported for 2 1/2 years.. since he lost his job... i suspect he is messing around or doing something behind my back while Im at work and he's all day at home on the internet. He's developed a friend brenda... and since I saw that he was talking to here a lot, one day I managed to get a copy of the Yahoo IM logs which say what day time and with whom thee is talking to and the whole conver. He apprentally has been flirtin with her and tells her lies that he's single, has a job as a High security person...and has a rich life. which is all a lie. He apparently doesn't want me talking to any of his friends and he rejects my request for myspace and yahoo cause it would show on my page that we're together. He said that he wants to be considered singel on the online world but in real life i dunno what he wants... he tends to make fun of me and expects me to have the house clean and cook and work.. since he doesn't have a job. He doesn't nothing but eat poop and sleep. but he tells me that he's waiting for me. I have a weight problem and theres been some occiasion when he's been a little violent. he has major anger management issues and tantrum issues too. Everytime I try to confront him with hard facts and proof he gets offensive. I love him. He used to tell me he loved me too intill 2 years ago. He hates going out in public with me b/c he says i imbarass him. Im in the loop whole or mind controlled. Is there anyway that i can help our relationship, help him mentally? He's a ex-navy.. and he likes weapons,... inregardes to that he had a honorable discharge for mental disorder. Sometimes I see two sides of him, and I just want to help him. Please let me know your thoughts. My heart is heavy and throbbing with pain.
-Mel Advice
I think deep in your heart you know there isn't anything you can do for him. He's a deeply disturbed man and he's only going to get worse. Do you have friends or family that live close by? If you do then please leave him now. He'll continue to suck the life out of you, then when there's nothing left, he'll leave you for another woman who'll support him. Then where will you be? You'll be broke, both financially and emotionally. You need to get him out of your life and start fresh. If you've supported this man for 2 years then you have a fairly good job. Wouldn't it be nice to spend that money on yourself, rather that a man who abuses you. So what if you have a weight problem, there are men who will find you beautiful, because you are beautiful.

-- from Jill
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