now that she's single

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
ive known this girl for four years now. we just recently gratuated high school. i liked her for a good portion of our high school career. but she had a boyfriend the whole time. we have always been extremely close and we share lots of stuff (food, drink, secrets, and other interests). like a week ago she broke up with her boyfriend (he broke up with her). she seems fine though. anyway, we've been hanging out and have more plans to hang out in the future. we talk a lot too. she also laughs at almost everything i say (even when i don't think it's that funny). i am also one of the few people she has said she wants to remain in contact with now that we are graduated. the problem is is that i am kind of hesitant to take myself down that road again. so my question is: what are some signs i can look for to see if she is showing interest in me? what kind of questions can i work into normal conversation to allicit some sort of response to get an idea of how she feels either way? Hmm? Advice
It really seems like she is showing all the signs of liking you. I would urge you to be cautious, though, for several reasons. 1: she probably is NOT over her old long-time boyfriend and 2: you are both about to leave for a new phase of your lives.

If you pursued this and ended up dating, it might be a very confusing time for you both, on so many levels. I would work on keeping your friendship going and enjoying each other, but in a light way. Time will tell if she is ready for a new man in her life. You also don't want to rush into something now if you are going to be busy with college, or a job, or whatever your after high school plans are. It's best to be free when you have major changes coming along.

So, your choices are to keep things light and friendly and wait it out...or to ask her directly how she feels about you. Both are good options. Think about what you really *want* here. It might be best to keep her as a good friend. If there is a chance for love there now, there will probably still be a chance later on, when she has been single a bit longer and your lives are both more stable. Good luck!

-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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