more help please....

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
im having a huge problem! im not atrracted to my girlfriend, (physically) i mean i love her but i keep asking myself why am i not attracted to her!? i don't want to feel like i have to feel atrracted to her, help! it's like seeing her and there's no spark (physical atrraction) and sometimes when im around other girls they are really atrracting! is that my bad side of me, trying to break us up? we havent kised yet either is that a main component of atrraction? Advice
Please limit your questions to once a week.

My guess is that nervousness is causing the lack of physical attraction. You said this is her first experience dating and that you felt you needed to teach her how to do things. That is something you can only do step-by-step both by taking action and by talking. She has to feel comfortable and knowing what you are think will help. Be sure to talk, smile, and laugh a lot. Share personal feelings and you will feel more natural together.

Yes, kissing should reduce the tension and increase the physical attraction. Tell her that you want to kiss her and unless she refuses then do it. Be sure to take it slow and gentle at first so she becomes used to the feelings.

Give it a week or two and if you still don't feel physically attracted to her it will be time to find a new girlfriend.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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