very confused and don't know what to do.

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
First I want to thank you guys for helping me through last year, you guys have taught me patience in getting my dream girl. So for the past 3 years I have been waiting for this girl, we've been friends this whole time and just about last weekend I've finally been getting the quality time I've been waiting for with her. Last week we were talking and she told me that this guy had ditched her on their movie plans, so then as we talked we decided that I would take her and we ended up having a great time. This week I decided to ask her to go trick-or-treating for Halloween and she also decided to invite me to her friend's party. The problem with this night was the party. I hardly knew anyone and it was as if I wasn't there. As the dancing started she started dancing with some guy as I sat in the corner just watching. It wasn't untill the third song that I maned up and took her by the hand and asked her to dance. But for the rest of the night she would trade off from me to him, I think that she was also flirting with him. I knew she was a big flirt before hand but I wasn't prepared for last night. I very confused, I don't know if she's playing hard to get or if she just doesn't like me. When we're alone together she's a whole different person and that's the one I like. I'm very kind to her and I'm the one who comforts her when she's down. I have confessed how I felt about her last year and she turned me down, that's why I'm confused. When we text or talk she'll say something that makes me believe that she wants to take our friendship further, but from her actions its something different. I still really like her she's a beautiful person and I would like her to be my girlfriend but I just don't get her. I'm on my second date, if you can call them dates, and when would be the right time to ask her to be my girlfriend? How should tell her my feelings for her? And how should I get her to notice me and be more interested in me without me having to change? I don't want to stop being nice to her and be something I'm not. I like very much and I care for her a lot, I feel its my time to be her man, but I'm very confused. Please help! Advice
You have finally started to make good progress with her. Don't blow it by going too fast. I don't think she is playing hard to get or doesn't like you. Instead, you are her good friend and if you take it easy with her she will grow to like you even more.

Try to get her to go on more dates with you but don't try for too many too fast.
When the time comes, tell her you are starting to "develop deeper feelings" for her and see how she responds. You don't have to change but you naturally will because you love her and we all change for the better with love guiding us.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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