I dont know what to do..
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
i'm having some difficulties with figuring out what i'm supposed to do..
2 years ago there was this girl who I liked, I asked her out and I got rejected.. we kept talking with each other and our friendship grew, at a moment we were like BFF's, after 7-8 months I lied to her about that i wasn't in love anymore with her.. we repeadetly had fights with each other.. I admitted that I was in love... 2 months later.. I told her I wasn't in love anymore (which i wasn't, I think..) 1 month after that we were just the good BFF's (we still had small conflicts..) but I had to move to an other country, we promissed that we would keep contact and to make it special we decided to write letters and send them by post.. 1 year,10's of letters, 100's of conversations and 2 girlfriends later..
i'm moving back.. figuring out now that I as fooling myself and i actually was in love with that same girl the whole time.. dispite the other gf's I had.
since a week or 2 from now i'm having small fights with her again.. afraid to tell her my feelings for her, afraid to bring our friendship in danger.. should I keep it as a secret for myself?? the fact that SHE is my biggest love and I keep on thinking of her every moment of the day? or should I admit it and face the consequences? what would be those consequences?
or should I break our "special" friendship? and just be normal friends.. not having those mails.. deep conversations.. advice.. and so on?
a confused guy who doesn't now what to do with his deep feelings...
Don't live a lie with her. It just won't work out. She is very sensitive to you and your feelings. If you are trying to hide your love for her she will know something is wrong and your relationship will not be true. In fact, this could explain the fights you sometimes have.
Since you are considering changing the relationship anyhow, why not take the chance (and it will be a chance) and tell her that you love her. The consequences are unknown but could range from her saying she loves you to a complete breakup. My advice is to accept that life is full of risk but you can't go on avoiding it.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com