Is this normal?
Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I have been dating a great guy for 6 months. We have been friends for about 3 years and discovered we were attracted to each other close to a year ago. Problem was .... I was married. My then husband and I had tons of problems and never could work them out. It was a marriage that should never have happened. Enough about that. My guy and I started dating pretty much right after I left. We have great chemistry and are extremely comfortable together. We can talk about anything. About 3 months into it he started to pull back saying he couldn't be what I needed right now but knew that we would get thru it and asked me to let him have his space. We talked about it and decided not to "break up" just to slow it down. We didn't go out together or anything for almost 2 months. During this time we both agreed ( his idea ) that we would not date or have sex with anyone else. We have finally started seeing each other again somewhat regularly, but it has changed. When we are together it just feels right. We have both said this many times. But when we are apart he sometimes pulls away. He still IM's me whenevr he sees me on and texts me regularly. ( has not missed a goodnight in over 3 months =) ) He says he has alot of stress with his job and can not give me the attention I deserve and does not want me to feel neglected. I trust him and believe him when he says he cares about me and does not want anyone else. Am I naive to keep trusting this will all work out?
Of course nobody can say this will all work out or not. So I guess you are somewhat naive to trust that it will.
My advice is to stick with this and hope it will work out. Seems you have a good thing going (sort of.) Why not give it more time and find out.
Set a deadline for when you will make your decision (you can always change the deadline if things change for the better.) You might even let him know that you are not going to hang on forever so he can clear his mind.
Sorry you are in this situation.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com