I dont know what to do, i am clueless
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
My ex and i have been broken up for six months now. About a week after we broke up i took over roses and a note telling her how i felt and apologizing to her for everything. That night she called me and told me she forgives me but wasnt ready to get close to me again.
Over the last month i have noticed an increase in her contact and it seems more friendly as well. Our first real conversation was nearly a month ago, when we talked for about a half hour and caught up on pretty much everything she has been up to. All the changes she has made to herself some of which i had asked her to do while we were together which werent personality changes just habit i would have liked her to at least slow down on, like smoking, which she quit. That night she told me also that the ex we broke up both time because of she hasnt talked to and doesnt want anything to do with, which is about the third time she has told me this. She has also before this gotten jealous and thought i was seeing someone else, she texted me the one day saying she was happy for me and said i didnt have to be afraid to tell her i was seeing someone else. I texted back saying i wasnt and that my heart was still with her. Our conversations usually short and she contacts me i havent contacted her i wanted to let her go at her pace but when she does call it seems for no real reason or just to talk to me because i usually get something like "i was just thinking...." or "i thought i would call and be nosy..." The time before last that she called, she called just to tell me that my favorite author had a new book out, while we were talking i also noticed her flirty voice that i used to get all the time. The very next night she called to tell me that she had bought the book for me and that i could go over to her house and pick it up that she would put it somewhere outside because she wasnt going to be home. I had to meet up with her to get something a few weeks ago and when she was walking away from me she looked back over her shoulder and gave me a flirty smile. The day after she called about the buying the book, i texted her good morning and about an hour later she text me back and we texted for about three hours. Everytime we talk on the phone now we always say to have a good night or day. Are these signs she is thinking about getting back together and what do i do. do i contact her more or not? I never tried or wanted to get back with an ex, this is the first one, she is the first one i have ever truly fallen in love with and i would love to fix this and try again. Our relationship was as perfect as anyone could have asked for, we never fought or argued we could alway talk things out until the very end. We were only together 6 months but we were already engaged and planning the wedding. I need help on what to do. I have been pretty much only contacting her when i need to, doing the hard to get thing. Sorry this is so long and thanks for any help you can give me.
Since she is seeking you out, perhaps it is time for you to drop the "hard to get" routine. If she doesn't respond to that then go back to it.
Sometimes you have to bounce back and forth a bit to figure out what works for both of you. Once you've read the book, ask her out to dinner as a thank you present and to talk about the book.
Her behavior seems receptive and actually proactive. Take advantage of it.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com