How do I get over him if he won't let me?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Person
I haven't really been dating this guy for very long, maybe bout 6 months but i really like him, first of all he is a scorpio and very difficult to deal with he never shows his emotions and avoids every situation, he will never talk about anything and always says "I don't know" when i ask him what he is feeling, it frustrates me to no end. Anyway when we started dating it was really good we got a long so well and had so much fun together when things started to get serious he started to pull away and get really distant when i asked him why he said that he was afraid of getting hurt again and has issues with trusting but wants to be with me i just need to be patient when he was just starting to trust me there were ppl that didn't want us together telling him things about me that i was cheating on him and that i have a horrible past and he belived them i tried to reassure him that it was not true so he tried to give me the benifit of the doubt but still had it in the back of his head and would always break up with me and then want me back and his excuse was that he was scared and that he was testing me by breaking up with me to see if i would just go to the next guy or not and that this would let him know if i was "the one" the last time we got back together it was all the same but this time he was not giving me the attention that i wanted and needed meanwhile i was spoiling him like a baby (cooking, massaging,catering to every need) and was not getting any attention i got sick of it and broke up with him and told him that he was not giving me what i needed him he didnt even try and fight for us, when i asked him if thats what he wanted and want me to move on he said no that he wants to be with me. But does not want to talk bout what needs to change to be together. I want to be with him but i can tell that nothing is ever going to change and i will never get what i need out of him, i know the relationship is not a good one and when i try and stop calling him and try to get over him( which is the hardest thing to do) he will call me with some random thing just so he can talk to me. I try and talk to him changing and he really does not want to talk bout it. I want to get over him and move on but deep down i keep believing that it is going to work somehow also i feel if he really wanted it he would try but i seem to be the only one that is trying to talk about it. Just when i cut contact and feel like i can get over him he calls and the process starts again..im going crazy and dont know what to do and i just really stupid and being played?...help
If he were willing to talk about change then there might be some hope for you.
But he isn't and you won't get what you need from him.
Next time he calls, cut the call very short and keep doing that until he realizes that you have cut the cord. He is too wound up in his Scorpio ways to see the forest for the trees.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com