He's not over her, likes me, but is afraid
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
This guy and I met in class and we talked over winter break via text and IM. The few days before school started, he came over to hang out and ended up staying the night. I had no idea he liked me as anymore more than a friend, but we ended up cuddling and making out. A couple days later, he tells me it was a mistake. He thought he was ready, but he's not over his ex. They dated for 4 years (basically high school) and she dumped him the beginning of this year because he is going to college 45 minutes away from her.
He hasn't even talked about the break-up or opened up about anything with anyone but me, but now he's pushing me out as well. He doesn't want to talk about it and says he is content with his life. Plus, he says that I'm so similar to her (I assume personality-wise) that if we dated, he can see us taking the same course they did. However, he wants to still be friends and hang out.
I don't want to give up (he means that much to me) but I'm not really sure what the best course would be. It's frustrating that he won't let himself move on.
Continue to be his friend and listen to his problems.
This will help him work his way through his worries and make him a happier person. Everyone needs at least one sympathetic ear.
In addition, he is likely to grow closer to you and may fall for you. I hope it happens.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com