Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I am living relationship for six years and I think I found the right man who I can trust, he is a great friend and loves me a lot. However, I am not in love with him and never had the chance to be with a man who I could love and he loved me back. Now I met someone who started flirting with me at work and after 2 years finally we had one night together. We are also very similar and good friends. After that night I got too emotional, I offended him telling him he was cold to me and that it was difficult working with him. (I didn't explain why). I am afraid I finally spoilt our friendship. I know he liked me but after spending a week together we are back to our old life and I texted if he wants to meet me. He said he was busy but will see me soon. Now I am expecting him to call me but he doesn't. For the first time I feel I am in love (I am over 30) and though I have the right man next to me I can't marry him. Is this new guy disinterested because I have a relationship or because I was too emotional after our night? Or he might be disappointed as maybe he expected different sexual experience? I have never had a one night affair before that's why I was upset. He doesn't know that. Shall I wait for months until he calls me? I have much to say to him but I know men don't like talking about feelings. I am also aware of my age and that if I don't find love I have to settle down with the man who loves me and I can trust. However until I believe love finds me one day, I can't marry him. That's why I was so hoping that this guy would love me. But how could he love me, if we can't date until I am not single?
You are going to have to have a talk with this new guy. Spell it out for him how you feel. Leave it up to him to reply. Not all guys avoid talking about their feelings.
You are cheating on your boyfriend, and that is good for no one. You ought to think harder about that.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com