Getting her back

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
My ex and I had been dating for almost 4 years now. She is currently studying in an overseas institution while I'm in the army.

We communicate with one another either by phone or MSN, but mostly by phone.

Recently, i have been rather tired from my duties and therefore wasn't in the right mood to talk to her. This made me reply her in single line sentences. It went on for about 4-6weeks.

I guess she just got tired of it and she told me that during the 4-6weeks, she realized that she could actually go on without me, and that she was sick and tired of the way i talk to her.

I did try explaining things to her but she just wouldn't listen. She said that it was my personality and I couldn't change it. So we broke up.

During the past week, I realized that I have been taking her for granted, and even though i was tired, I shouldn't have spoken to her in that manner. I remembered that we could actually communicate well, and that was the reason why we got together in the first place.

She is currently 13000km away, with a time difference of 8 hours. She initially refused to listen and believe that I could change, and we have not spoken to one another since then. How do i convince her otherwise? Do i contact her now, or after some time has passed, or even wait till she contacts me first? What steps should i take to reconcile with her?

P.S. We had been dating for 1 year LDR


Beagle Advice
Give her another few days to think things over and then call her.

Tell her you have come to the conclusion that she is the right woman for you and that you will put more effort into the relationship. Ask for a chance to prove it to her.

Send her some flowers and candy through the internet with a card that says "I miss you." This should soften her heart toward you. In fact, send these things before you call her.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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