new girlfriend flirting alot

Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Male
I've been dating a girl for 4 months, getting serious we've both met each others kids. Went on vacation with my family, my sister's fiance which she met once and his brother and wife which she hadn't met before. The first night his brother and wife and my girlfriend were in the hot tub, having drinks. She got out and stood near it talking to someone. the brother walked back to the hot tub and rubbed her behind or 'goosed' her. they both looked at each other and smiled. i was sitting nearby and saw this. then she told me she was showing pictures from her camera to my sisters fiance first thing in the morning before anyone was up and gave him her cell phone number because he wanted her to send them to him, even though he doesn't have an e-mail address. then we were at the beach, i was standing with my sisters fiance and his brother, she was in the water and came out, lowered the front of her bikini bottom to 'get shells out'. my sisters fiance said 'wow, it looks like she is flirting with you' and i said, more like you guys. i talked to her about the hot tub thing with the brother and she acted like she didn't know what i was talking about. my sister got mad when she found out about my girlfriend giving her cell phone to her fiance and my girlfriend can not figure out why we are upset. i had an ex wife that cheated on me for a year, and my girlfirend is saying that i am over sensitive. she just says that she will be loyal and she likes the way she is, and doesn't think she has to change for me. I honestly don't know if i am overly jealous or what the line of flirting should be. is it anything goes as long as you don't cheat? Advice
At her age, she has formed her personality, is happy with it, and says she is not going to change. And, likely, she isn't capable of changing.

It would be better if you were able to laugh off these jealousy-provoking behaviors and relax. Perhaps some of what she does is an instinctive way to become accepted within the family by allowing familiarities not usually accorded to outsiders. It is dangerous for her to walk so close to the line of unacceptable behavior but she is probably used to it.

My advice is to enjoy her as she is and put your jealousy on a back burner.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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