in love with my best friend

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
and i really shouldn't be. she's a girl with alot of emotional issues and she finds solace in the fact that i'm her friend. i'm a very loving and forgiving person who will always be there for her no matter what she does, and she knows that. thats why she's alway teasing and hitting me, which i don't mind because its almost enjoyable, and its also why she talks to me about everything. but at the same time, she doesn't want to get any closer to me than friends cause as much as she knows that, she's still scared i might hurt her if she gets too close. i understand her feelings, and thats why i've tried to keep mine from her. if she ever knew how strongly i felt about her, i'd lose my best friend and she'd lose her confidant. so im trying to divert my affection towards other girls, but its difficult because i've always had trouble with girls. still something tells me that there's something wrong with this. is holding back my feelings really helping her or me? is it ok for her to depend on me so much but at the same time not want to get close to me? Advice
Since she is physically interacting with you, it means she is attracted to you. Return her affection by "play fighting" with her too. Also establish a habit of hugging each other as friends. Physical affection has a powerful affect on most people and she should respond.

Try this for a while and see what develops. After a month or so, you will have a sense of how she feels about you as more than a friend.

If you are still not sure, tell her that you are "developing feelings" for her and see what she says. Be sure not to come on too strong because that might scare her away.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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