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We don't love qualities, we love persons; sometimes by reason of their defects as well as of their qualities. --Jacques Maritain

I fell out of love

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I have been with my boyfriend for 5 1/2 years. We have been living ot gether for the past 3 years. About 1 1/2 years ago I decided to really take my career seriously and have put many hours into it. Since then, the lack of time I've spent with him has really separated us. We both do different things, have different friends, etc. Also, somewhere in the middle, I stopped loving him. I love him as a person, and can not even imagine hurting him, but am not in love with him. I've recently changed jobs, moving up the ladder, and all my boyfriend wants is for me to quit and spend more time with him. I have n urge to do that at all. Also, I have deep feelings for my new boss, and I know he has the same feelings for me. We are both the same age, with the same goals, drive, humour, etc. I am so lost and confused, I have kissed my boss, several times, but never more. I've tried to tell my boyfriend that I don't love him anymore, but he said he will do anything to help me find it again. What should I do??? Also, just before I started this job, my boyfriend and I bought a house together, we are expected to move in in two weeks. All the paper work and such is completed. I feel so trapped, what should I do??

RomanceClass.com Advice
First is to stop this fling you are having with your boss. You both may get fired or demoted.

Second tell your boyfriend what has been going on.

Third get to a professional counsellor as fast as you can. You are going to need help figuring this out.

As far as the house goes... ask your real estate agent if there is some way to back out of buying the house without losing a lot of money. This may be very inconvenient to do, but it may be necessary. Give it some thought.

If you have to move into the house then make the best of it while you talk with the counsellor.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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