does she want a second date or not? Bounceback guy?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Okay, so I've had a crush on this girl that I live with (I live in a house with five people) for awhile, and last week I got my chance to act on my feelings.
I went to see her debut a student film, and then afterwards we both went down to a cool Philadelphia area and hung out for awhile. We had a lot of fun, talking as we walked along the riverfront, holding hands, and fell asleep to a movie. (with her head on my shoulder)
The next day I tell her I had a great time and if she wants to do something this weekend or next weekend, let me know. I think her reaction was good, though I wasn't positive--she seemed to smile, and I said let me know by Friday if you want to go this festival on saturday and sunday, or a comedy show on Friday. Also, if you're busy this weekend there's a great comedian coming into town next Saturday and I'd love to take her to see him. She seemed interested to some degree--she asked "Why by Friday?" and I explained I had to get tickets, which she seemed to understand.
Flash forward to Thursday. She's been busy, so we haven't had time to talk much that week. (She DID text me Wednesday to ask me to come to another screening of hers, but I couldn't make it) We've seen each other in passing, but haven't said much. We haven't discussed what happened last weekend at all. I tell her the details about the festival, but she says she's "busy this weekend" because she has to go home for Mother's Day saturday and Sunday. She doesn't say anything about wanting to do something tomorrow (i.e., Friday) or say "but let's do something some other time".
I've never had this happen with someone I've lived with before, so I just wanted to know if something is amiss. Should we have talked more during the week if she is still interested? Wouldn't she mention wanting to do something next weekend if she was truly interested? Is it too early to make a judgement? At what point do I know that despite the fun we had she's not interested in a follow-up date? And is there any way to know why, because this is pretty frustrating?
One other thing--she mentioned a few days before we went out that she broke it off with some guy and it was a little sad because it was her first relationship. After that we stayed up late talking to each other for two nights. The following weekend was when we went out--she didn't mention him, and she didn't seem to be thinking about him. We haven't stayed up talking since. Was I the bounceback guy for a weekend?
Help me out if you can, thanks a lot!
You may have been the bounceback guy.
Don't say anything about a date and see what she does. If she doesn't mention it, it means she is not interested. Otherwise she would say she was.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com