Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Hi, I am a junor in highschool and my boyfriend is a senior and graduates in just a few days. After that he is going to college out of state and I will be about a 7 hour drive from him. he is the best thing to ever happen to me and we both have decided that we want to stay together. However, I am very nervous about it. I am scared that the distance will hurt our relationship and we will grow apart. I rally dont want that to happen. I am afrade he will be alone and someone else might try to take my place. He knows how i feel, and he has told me multiple times that no one could ever take my place and he will do everything he can to keep us together. But i still get nervous and scared something might happen. Do you have any tips for long distance relationships like this one?

thank you! Advice
A good way to increase the chances of this working out is for you to decide that you are going to the same college he is going to. If you are not going to college then plan to move to be with him. These ideas will hold you together.

Also, keep a regular line of communications open whether it is by phone or internet or both. Carefully determine what you are going to do on major holidays like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Spring Break. This will give you things to look forward to. Try to squeeze in a weekend visit... one in early October where you visit him and another in the late Winter where he visits you (the October visit is more important).

Send him treats like chocolate chip cookies. If you can afford it, buy something like a big tin of popcorn off the Internet. Maybe your parents could let you put it on their credit card. Send these food items during the first few weeks or first month because that is when he will enjoy something from home.

If you don't have an easier way to do it, send him photos of you and friends attached to emails.

Don't blast him with all these plans at once or he'll feel overwhelmed.

Finally, don't give him the idea you are getting close to other guys or he may decide you are leaving him and call it quits.

All this planning should also reduce the natural worries that you have about some other girl taking him away.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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