Finding Time in College
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I've been dating this girl for while now. We're both in college and it is actually the first time for either of us to date. When we're together we get along really well and have good conversations, but she hardly ever has time to see me. But she's told me that she really likes me and she likes to spend time with me. Then She always says that she has homework and times when she can see me and I try and make a date she just says maybe, but we usually get together. So, my question is this; if she could just make time and put off homework but doesn't does that mean she's not interested in me? And if she is interested how can I get more of a commitment from her?
You have to remember that college is a HUGELY expensive place and there is all sorts of pressure on those who attend college to do well. You're only in college for 4 years, but you pay off those loans for another 10-20 years. So a relationship often takes a back seat to studies and exams.
That being said, be supportive of her. It sounds like you somehow have more free time than she does. So go help her out! There's nothing that says she has to study alone. Go read a book in the room with her. Bring her in take-out food or make something and bring it to her. Study together in the library, or on the grass. Show her you support her in her studies, NOT that you're trying to harm her desire to study. She'll appreciate that. And the more you're together - even if it's just quiet side by side reading - strengthens your bonds. And if you're already together, and she DOES get 15 free minutes for a walk, you're there to go with her!
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com