i want her back so much and dont want to give up
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Hi there, I was wondering if you could help me.
My girlfriend and I were going out for just over a year and we loved each other very much, things were great between us and we made each other so happy. However, we broke up in the middle of last summer due to a big situation. She became pregnant. It started arguments about whether or not we should have kept it, and like most men, I said to have an abortion and I am disgusted at myself for ever suggesting it and I wish so much that we had kept it. I think of her and the abortion she went through everyday and thatís no lie. I am sickened at what I did. A month or so after the incident she asked me back but I was so enraged at myself I said it wasnít the right timing due to the state I was in and I regret not saying yes so much. I asked her back a while after that and she said no.
Since our breakup we have remained in contact a lot, more or less daily contact and we have met up a lot and got on well with no arguments. I have helped her out financially as she has had problems with debt. I pay for half of her car each month (which she asked nicely if I could and I took it as a good sign) and pay her mobile phone contract for her as she lives on her own and needs a phone and other things aswell without going into detail. She told me that she didnít know where shed be without my help. Incase you are thinking, she is not a money grabber and would not use me, I donít let people use me. She genuinely needs the help and I am more than happy to provide it.
As you know, it has been a few months now since we broke up and I have been trying to prove to her how much I care. I love this girl so much and I know that she is the love of my life. I believe that you need to fight for love and I am prepared to do it. Could you provide me with any advice as to how to break out of the friendship zone and show her that I still love her? She said that im a good friend and thatís all I can be at the moment because I hurt her with the whole abortion thing and I understand that. I know that things would be a lot different this time around as I have learned from my mistakes but how can I show her this?
Please help me and give me advice as to what to do next and how to try and get her back. Shes a wonderful girl n perfect in every way and I do not want to and will not give up.
Sorry you are still in a bind with your friend.
My advice is to ask her right out what would make her take you back as a real boyfriend. If she brings up the abortion then ask her what you can do to make it better and how long might it take. This will encourage her to think of your situation more seriously.
Additionally, you should develop a temporary financial condition which causes you to cut back on your contributions to her. While she is not taking advantage of you, it will make it clearer to her how much she depends on you.
Always remember you are trying do a kindness for her. From what you have said, you two would make a wonderful couple.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com