Will my relationship be over soon?Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Well me and my boyfriend have a baby together and I love him with all my heart and we've been together for 3 wonderful years until the fighting got worse and worse and now when we fight I feel as though he dosent give me enough attention that I deserve I do everything for him and I ask him to change a couple of things for me and he says he will but when I look the other way he goes right back and does those things again, so how can I go about handling him lying to me and us fighting to the point where we cant stand eachother anymore and we hit eachother and I tell me to leave, and I get so depressed when he leaves me and dosent call or ask about me. What should I do in a situation like that, please help?
First off, have no touching rule when you argue. Absolutely no exceptions.
At first this will be very hard to do and it will take a lovingly agreed upon deal of no touching. This should be a very hard and fast rule.
Next, stop accusing him of lying. Lying is when someone says something that they KNOW is false. When he promises to change he hopes he will but he isn't lying if he falls back into bad ways.
You both learned to argue from hearing it when you were children. You have to break that link or your child will learn the same bad habits,
When you argue, learn to use the phrase "I feel" rather than using the term "You." "You" sounds like blaming.
With some hard work, you won't have to break up. Also, ask around and see if you can get some couples counseling to help you out.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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