Friends or Solo?

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Hello. I'm a 23 year-old guy. I've never had a girlfriend before, just one night stands, so I guess I'm behind the curve when it comes to dating. Anyway, I sit next to this girl in one of my classes. I wasn't all that interested at first, but the more we talked, the more I started liking her. I bumped into her at a club one night and told her how I felt (with the help of some liquid courage). She said she's "kind of" seeing someone, but it isn't serious. Then, she gave me her number. Two days later, I still haven't called her. I don't know if it would seem too pushy, epescially considering I'm going to see her in class 2 times this week. So, I guess I have two problems. Number one, should I back off until the class is over? We have assigned seats, so things could be really awkward if they don't work out. It even crossed my mind that could be why she gave me her number, to avoid awkwardness in class. Number two, the bigger of the two problems, if and when I set up these "dates" would it be alright if we go out with the company of friends for a while. I'm really shy and would prefer to do things that way, but I'm not in high school anymore. So, I don't know if that would seem weird or not. Thanks for the help Advice
My feeling is that it is critical for you to have a girlfriend before long.

If you put it off, you may get into the habit and end up alone for the rest of your life. Being alone may be right for you, so don't take what I say as the gospel. But, you should find out soon one way or the other.

Since she gave you her phone number, you should call her as soon as possible. She is expecting to hear from you and if you don't call she may be cold to you in class. If things don't work out in the long run, just consider her a friend.

Going out on dates is how you get to know someone better. So maybe two dates could include other people, but then you need to go out just you and her. Yes, it is weird.

Good luck, George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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