married woman in love with someone else

Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
I am 43 and married and I met a single man almost 2 years ago who is 33. We met by pure chance and I was drawn to him instantly without knowing much of anything about him. He felt the same for me. We have a very deep connection emotionally and spiritually and I can relate to him as if he was a best girlfriend.

I feel so much guilt over this situation yet I am so happy. I feel like I have truly met a soulmate.

I am not set financially to leave my marriage and have been thinking of going to school for a new career to afford to leave my situation but I do not know where to begin.

Any help or suggestions is appreciated. yes, I know it is wrong to cheat but it is not for sex, though that is beautiful and I never knew how wonderful it could be until now. I feel a shared connection, intellectually, spiritually and emotionally with this person and we both feel we are in love with each other. Advice
First off, you will eventually be caught by your husband so you should prepare for that.

Next, you should tell your husband and get marriage counselling--not what you want to hear, I'm sure.

As far as the finances go, I don't have enough information. Do you work now, how much do you make, what do you do. How much money do you need. If you have no job, try a temp agency or newspaper ads. Local colleges offer career paths. Go to the bookstore and get something on career guidance.

You didn't mention whether you have kids...hopefully not. Are you going to move in with your boyfriend or get your own housing?

Another thought... how long will it take you to get the education you need? Will your boyfriend be around as you get older, grayer, wrinkled, and other assorted problems of aging? Of course you think yes, but consider it.

I'm not trying to throw obstacles in your path but more trying to get you to really think through what is going on.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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