acting roles make me feel uncomfortable

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
When we started dating i knew of her interest in acting but we were having such a good time i never really stopped to think of the long term remifications of it and i would feel. now im a year and a half down the line with this girl and in way to deep as the reality of her acting ambitions really start to set in i am now understanding my feelings better when i realise now that she will be reaching as high as she can in this business which ultimatly means at some points romantic scenes/plays.

i know that the are millions of actors/actresses that do this as part of their job and nothing else and she re-assures me how proffessional she would be and how it is just acting, a job but i cant reconcile the difference in my mind as easily as she can, to me regardless of her portraying another character in a play it is still physically her doing the scenes and in any other situation people would never expect others to be so understanding surely? is the exception meant to exist for acting?

she also tried justification saying that her friends in acting who are in relationships say that their partners are completley fine with it but then again as i found out their partners are aspiring actors to so i guess they share the mentality. whcih makes that arguement a mute point to me.

thing is i love her so much, when she tries to justify why it is so important i know that it is a plea to me to understand so that she doesnt feel guilty, she says she wont do it if it harms the relationship but all the talk about it suggests otherwis and i dont want her to be unhappy and it feels like in the long run this is a lose lose situation because i cant promise her that i would be okay about it i certainly could never tell her that i am happy about it.

i am worried that for the sake of our relationship she takes a step back, doesnt try for bigger roles because of this and then ends up regretting what might have been and resenting me or on the flip side she goes for it with my consent and blessing and then as i fear it really bothers me and i end up resenting her for all the 'pretend' romance she has with others actors.

knowing myself better now in the future i would just steer clear of aspiring actresses all together but its too late, my heart already belongs to this one, how do i resolve my feelings about this?

thanks Advice
Jealousy is a destructive beast. It can undo a relationship.

You have to fight against it as hard as you can whenever it rears its ugly head. Read over the following sites and if you still need help seek out a counselor because in some cases that is all that has a chance of fixing things.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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