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What is he looking for?



Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I was originally friends with my boyfriend and his friends. Before anything ever happened between us I had a one night thing with one of his friends at the time. I was single and did not think too much into it. Then My ex and I started spending alot of time together for about 2 months we were acting like a couple and doing things as a couple but everytime I would bring the subject up he would say he didnt have the feelings for me but the way he acted and what he said just didnt seem to be the same. He used to say he never chased girls and was very shy in that department which he is. He is italian and in a way is very old fashioned in the whole males can do anything but for women its a different story. Anyway we dated for about a year his family loved me thay accepted me like their own but all through our relationship he would bring up what I did with his friend before I was with him and it really got under his skin. He has a problem with trusting people his motto is 'trust nothing of what you hear and only half of what you see' this attitude definatley comes from his old fashioned bitter italian father. He broke up with me because he didnt have that real love feeling for me he knows Im a great person and he was kicking himself for not having that feeling so for 6 months we were still seeing each other behind everyones back he was not with any other girls and he was very jealous if I even went out with my friends and we evetually got back together which I thought would be for good now a year later the exact same thing has happenned I still love him so much and he "knows im such an awesome person" and he is not looking for any other girls. But he is acting like Im just going to hurt him and sleep with someone or something. He does not deal with his emotions he just blocks them out. What the hell do I do Im going crazy.




RomanceClass.com Advice
There is not much new I can tell you about jealousy. It sucks and is very difficult to get rid of.

If he really cares about you he should get counselling to try to overcome this problem.

Meanwhile, here are some websites to help you:

http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveCat/23682

http://www.coping.org/growth/trust.htm

http://www.romanceclass.com/ebooks/jealousy_m.asp

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





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