Will I Ever Feel Attracted to Him Physically?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I just want to know from your experience, if you are in a relationship that seems to have every aspect that you look for besides the physical attraction, can that come later after you get to know that person better? I am dating someone now who gives me everything I want in a relationship, but he is not the most sexually attractive person to me. He doesn't repulse me in any way and is moderately attractive in my opinion, but I just want to know if maybe later after being with him longer and loving his personality, if the sexual attraction will be so important, or if I should try to find someone else who has all of these qualities together? Is it shallow to rule someone out just based on looks and physical attraction?
The answer is different for each couple. There are so many ways this can play out.
Of course no one should try to base a relationship on physical attractiveness only since you may soon discover bad character qualities.
Many people do develop a physical attraction after a while. But how long would it take is a guess I wouldn't try to make.
I assume you are intimate with him based on your age and the way you describe your feelings. You didn't mention how long you had been seeing him which is important.
Best you can do is give it long enough to determine for your self whether you are gradually becoming physically attractive. This could take six months to a year if you think it is worth the time and effort.
If no attraction develops, I would not recommend making a permanent commitment with him since a relationship with a poor physical connection is likely to fail.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com