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Love doesn't sit there like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all of the time, made new. --Ursula K. LeGuin

pregnancy troubles

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
okay it goes like this ive been seeing my girlfriend for a while and it was going grate until she decided to tell me everything she has done with guys older then me. From the beggining i knew she was a little experianced but i always beleved she was a virgin she always told me ohh im waiting for the one or when the time is right. Well recently we had a fight and we made up and we fell even more for each other well she decided to tell me something that she had been hiding since before we had decided to hook up,now before i get to this part i have to tell you that around the whole time she had given me little hints one in particular she said "what would you do if i was pregnant" i always joked with her of course and she would laugh too but she told me today that she needed to talk to me in person, so i said what about? she said you'll find out an hour later she called and said i need to tell you now i said okay, she told me that one week before we got together she had gotten drunk at a party and that she had lost her virginity, wait theres more, it turns out the guy didn't use a condom and now she most likely might be pregnant. so heres what i need help deciding i told her i'd have her back and that i'd be there for her but the only thing is she lied to me from day one and now that she finally told me i don't know what to think i care for her so much but i don't think she knows what she is putting me through i need help on deciding should i end thid whole thing right now or should i keep having her back, i love this girl she means the world to me but its not my kid im not the one who messed up she is. you see my problem do your best to help thank you so much

sincerely, losemyself

RomanceClass.com Advice
First thing is to find out for sure if she is pregnant or not.

Go to a pharmacy and buy a pregnancy kit. Once you know for sure, you will be in a position to make a better decision. If she is pregnant she will have to decide whether to keep it, abort it, or put it up for adoption. You could give her advice but obviously it would be her decision.

What you personally do is your own decision. Are your ready to be a parent and all that goes with it... reduced social life, no school, lower paying job, etc?

Do what is in your best interests. She is the one who made the mistake so you shouldn't have to pay. But since you love her, you may decide differently.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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