She likes me where it counts but she's stuck in a 'just friends' mentality

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I have a best friend who I almost went out with but I called it off because at the time I wasn't really interested in having a girlfriend and I made up some excuse about how I didn't want to gamble our friendship and she seemed to grudgingly accept though I later found out that she was quite upset by this. I later realised what a mistake this was and started making advances but we're quite flirty all the time and I thought she hadn't noticed. She got a boyfriend later but he dumped her not too long later but they still saw a lot of each other and I know she really liked him. A few weeks ago I got a little drunk and ended up confessing that I really wanted to step things up but she said that all this time all she got was mixed signs off me and then started saying we should just friends which I let her know I wasn't too happy about. Things were a little awkward between then and now but last night we were drunk at a wedding and she asked me to come into town later. I asked her if her ex-boyfriend or this guy she's dating were going to be there cos I didn't wanna go if they were and she went off again saying that we should just stay friends. I made it clear that I liked her a lot more than she realised and I was serious this time but she also told me that her ex is leaving the country today and it was his leaving do that night so he's out of the picture now. She does have a guy she's dating though and though I know she's not overly interested in him I haven't written him off so patience is something I need to use sparingly. I have no interest in being 'just friends' so I'm not afraid to risk our friendship but now she knows I like her subtle flirting might now work and I need to break her out of this line of thinking. There was a film I was talking about going to see with her but I think she'd think differently of things like this post-confession. Advice
Well, the cat's out of the bag.

She knows how you feel about her and the ball is in her court. So far, she says she only wants friendship.

You want to know how to get her to feel more strongly toward you.

Since you are best friends, you are in a great position to influence her feelings. Do what you are already doing... going out to movies, restaurants, etc. so that when she splits up with her current boyfriend she will know you are still waiting.

Try to not get drunk with her because that hasn't been very productive. Let her get high and wait for her to have her confession (if there is going to be one.)

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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