logo


Romantic Forums! Get the answers you seek quickly and easily! If you can't find what you need
here amongst our tens of thousands of tips and questions, be sure to Post in our Romantic Forum!
We've got over 9,800 members ready to give you a hand!
A Love Quote
Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything. -- Katharine Hepburn



Lying About your Past



Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
i'm a 19 yeaar old college student i have been with my current boyfriend for 2 years. before i knew him i had made some bad choices in my life, i lost my virginity when i was 14 years old of course i am ashamed of this. when we first started going out he got curious and would ask me things and i lied to him. a few weeks in the relationship became a few months and every time he asked i kept lying about a year into the relationship i came clean and told him everything, now a year later he constantly accuses me of cheating on him and he keeps throwing my past in my face like it is his to hold against me.

how should i handle this? i dont want to separate because i love him and he loves me. is he taking advantage of the situation?




RomanceClass.com Advice
The issue is that you've lied to him constantly for a solid year because you didn't trust him. Now after all that time you're asking him to trust you - that NOW you are telling the truth and being honest - and he's having of course a lot of trouble with this. All relationships are based on honesty and trust. You caused a very important part of your relationship to be based on lies and deceit and that can be really, really hard to recover from.

The issue is that you have to rebuild his trust in you. All the things he's saying are symptoms of his distrust - his thoughts that if you lied to him about your past, why wouldn't you lie about your present, too? I would consider going to therapy with him if he isn't getting through this on his own. But it will take time, and it will take a lot of work on your part to show him you really do understand why what you did before was so wrong, and you fully understand that you would never do it again. You need to really live this fully and completely so he can grow to believe it. I have many pages on the site about recovering from a betrayal, which in essence this is. Hopefully they will help ...

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





Add RomanceClass  to Twitter Add RomanceClass  to Facebook Add RomanceClass  to MySpace Add RomanceClass  to Del.icio.us Digg RomanceClass+ Add RomanceClass  to Yahoo My Web Add RomanceClass  to Google Bookmarks Add RomanceClass  to Stumbleupon Add RomanceClass  to Reddit
 


Speak Your Mind - Share your Thoughts on this Question!

All Advice in the category - Arguments / Fighting

Browse our Answer Database
- Browse Answers by Question Category
- Browse Answers by Age Group
- Browse Answers by Date of Response



Please read through the advice on this site before you Submit your Own Question! We have thousands of pages of valuable advice that can immediately help you with your situation.
Advertisement


Sparkly Irridescent Glitz Gel

Going to a party or special event? What to feel special no matter what you're doing? Roll on some glitz! Perfect for adding a special bit of sparkle to your day or evening.

Buy Glitz Gel at EclecticLady.com




Bookmark this site so you can reference it any time you need romantic / relationship info in the future!

Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Twitter Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Facebook Add Romance+Class+Website+ to MySpace Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Del.icio.us Digg Romance+Class+Website+ Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Yahoo My Web Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Google Bookmarks Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Stumbleupon Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Reddit


 

Follow Me on Pinterest


Romantic Tshirts, Bags, Mugs and More!

Love is Patient
Love is Patient ...
Deeply Loved
Deeply Loved ...
Random Kindness
Random Kindness ...

These are just a small selection - Visit the RomanceClass Shop!

Join This Newsletter!


 
RomanceClass on Facebook




Join This Newsletter!

Past Issues





| About RomanceClass | Advertising | Privacy Policy | Submit a Suggestion |
All content copyright 2013 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.

this site is for amusement only - professional advice is not being rendered

Irish Wedding