Dating a Married Man

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I am involved with a married man. We met at work. He lives several states away from his wife and has done so for the past 12 years or so. Everyone who knows him, including myself, cannot understand this unusual partnership. Despite their living arrangments, they speak almost daily and discuss their grown children's lives, the finances, issues surrounding the family, typical issues that most spouses dicusss. Over the past 8 months we have become closer and I have fallen in love with him and he has with me. He has told me that he is going to divorce his wife but he wants to wait until the end of the year after his daughter's wedding. In the meantime, he has gone back "home" twice for family events and has another trip planned before his daughter's wedding. I feel foolish for holding on knowing that his other life remains intact. On the other hand, I really care for him and know that we could have a great future together. I need some advice as I am hopelessly confused. Advice
Some things to consider:

Are you the first woman he has fallen in love with during the past 12 years? If not, find out what broke them up.

How will he adjust to living with a woman rather than doing long distance? Are you sure that you two can live together successfully?

Why are you hesitating when it is only four more months until you two can be together? That doesn't show much strength of love on your part.

Then think about the usual things: money, children, family, friends. Where will you find the most trouble?

Go to a bookstore and buy a book on divorce... there are many.

Good luck to you! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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