Does He Like Me?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I really dig this guy. He's really intelligent, knows himself pretty well and in the process of reaching his goals which is so attractive to me. I do know that in his life right now he is concentarating on himself and trying to sort out his life and working hard at it. We have mutual friends and that is how we met. I've just started having a huge crush on him a few months ago but have noticed him before but not to the intensity it is now.
In the past, before I really was into him, he use to flrt with me big time with suggestive comments, touches and such. Now, I guess, our friendship has grown (we don't phone each other or anything like that) and we actually have conversations instead of just smiles and giggles (from me, mostly). When it is just him and I, which happens rarely, he'll put his arms around me or look at me. At a party one night, I was sitting very close to another guy and he noticed. Later on when it was just him and I, he asked why I wasn't "snuggling" up with that guy. I immediately thought...ooohhh, maybe he is kind of jealous. But what do I know. He could have just been trying to be funny.
Another example, everytime I would come over, he'd jump out of his room and come over to talk to me. That's a pretty good example but that hasn't happened for a couple month. When he broke up with his girlfriend awhile ago and I came over, he came right up to talk to me and even gave me a neck rub. He gave me a neck and back rub a couple weeks ago. I don't know, I'm getting mixed signals from him and I figure that he likes the attention I give him but...doesn't really want anything really.
Since I've been into him more, I've been over to his place a lot more(he's roommates with my good friend) and I think, maybe that is too much and I should give him space. What is funny is that if I am gone for a week to two weeks without seeing him, he's really interested in me and wants to be in the same room as me but when I'm around a lot, he's like "whatever". It's crazy.
So anyway, I've figured he is hot and cold. What I want to know is if he is really interested in me or if he is just...I don't know, confused. Maybe he just likes my company and that is all.
Lately, it seems as if he has been going through some things and I feel like I'm coming on too strong. His roommie, my friend says that he thinks this guy has a slight idea I like him. He has shown pictures of his family and friends to me and his roommie has not ever seen them. I mean, sometimes I think he really likes me and other times, I think I'm nuts. What's going on is my question because I can't seem to figure it out.
Oh, another thing is, one night we were on the topic of guys and girls and I asked him if he was into seeing a couple of women at a time and he said, "does it look like it". I said no and he said, "Yeah, (my name), I have girls coming around at a certain time and have them going out the back door before you come in." He never has girls over but he likes women and has gotten a phone number in the last week. So, maybe, he isn't into me...
Obviously he likes you, he's giving you back rubs and hanging out with you! That's what friends do, it's not what enemies or even uninterested people do.
So build up that friendship. I have a whole guide on making friendships stronger and more intimate -
Romance isn't an on/off switch where he either "likes you" or doesn't. It's a long, giant stretch of shades of grey and people slide up and down that scale ALL the time - even married people. So depending on his mood and what he ate and who he saw last he could be ANYWHERE on that scale. Your aim is to start spending more time with him and see if you can both slide a little more closer together.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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