Long distance relationship: Should I stay friends?
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Sorry it's so long, but it's a long story.
I met this guy about a year ago on a forum website. He's really sweet and very shy. He lives a few states away, and he's very sensitive, When I first started talking to him, we were good friends and we started talking on the phone within a few months. We talk every day. He told me about how he's writing a book and trying to get published, and in one of the books he's writing, he based a character on me, name and all.
I started to think I had a crush on him, and ever since then I'm sure I've developed feelings for him. I'm pretty shy, and I don't have that much self esteem. Just last week, we had a conversation where he said that I was beautiful inside and out, rare as that is. I felt my stomach turn over and my face turn the color of a sunburned beet.
A few days ago he asked me if I ever had that problem where you want to tell someone something, but you're afraid of their reaction, but you'll go crazy if you don't. I said I did, and that you have to say something before you end up dying of insanity. Then he said that he can't say anything because of the inevitable, and I knew why he said that. He got turned down earlier last year, and I felt bad that he would say that.
I had a long talk with a friend of mine who is in a long distance relationship, and has been in one for about two years. He says it is manageable. He also said that you have to say something, but I'm a little apprehensive. I'm not sure both my parents would approve, my mom would probably prove sympathetic. I'm going into high school this fall, and I'm not sure if I'll like anybody there, though I'm not one of those girls who wants to date every cute guy in sight. I know I've found a wonderful, honest person, but I'm scared to ask him if he likes me.
Thanks for reading my novella,
Rin
RomanceClass.com Advice
It's fairly clear that you both like each other and are too shy to say so.
One of you will have to be brave enough to say it. You could tell him that you are "starting to develop feelings" for him. Then ask him how he feels about that. You will probably be pleasantly surprised to find out that he feels the same way.
However, I do advise you to interact with boys at school so that you have some confidence in yourself. If you stay shy too long, it can affect (badly) your life for years to come. Fight shyness whenever you can.
Good luck! George -- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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