My fiance cheated on me 11 months before the wedding...

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I am a 24 yr old male and have a beautiful vibrant 21 yr old fiance. She is the love of my love. Means the world to me. She went home this past weekend alone for the first time in over 2 years. I usually go with her. We have been engaged for just over a year. We have an apartment together with a lease for another 9 months, and have a new 1 yr old puppy. Everything we own we paid for together combining our money. Two days ago she called me saying that she cant live with herself if she doesn't tell me. She said she went to dinner with one of her ex's the night before (without me knowing) and then went to a bar. Many drinks later she drove him home and he wouldn't let her drive home because she was drunk. One thing led to another she had sex, and has called me crying the next day because she couldn't handle her conscience. She has cheated on past boyfriends but has been true to me through our two year run. Please help she means the world to me. I have read many posts somewhat like mine, but none truly answer the questions. Her answer to the infamous "why" question is that she wanted to test herself to know that she could truly marry me and be good to me and she failed. What am I supposed to say to that?

Thank you,

Ex B-baller Advice
It isn't awfully unusual for either the fiance or fiancee to cheat before the wedding. Something about a last hurrah... a last fling, in other words. Most people don't admit to it.

You are lucky that she was honest enough to let you know. Now you can make up your mind what to do. Having made this mistake once, she is less likely to make another mistake in the future.

If you want to save the relationship, have many long gentle talks about the level of your devotion to each other.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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