He Keeps Cheating, I Keep Staying
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I have a boyfriend who cheated on me twice and i know he is willing to do it again, but i love him too much to break up with him... what do i do?
There is a very definite point when a relationship no longer becomes a healthy relationship and turns into a destructive relationship. I really think you have crossed that line in here.
Yes, you love him. You can love a baby, too, as it wanders forward and bashes you on the head with a rattle. But you tell it to stop. And if that baby keeps coming forward and bashing you on the head with its rattle, eventually you take the rattle away or put the baby in the crib or something. You don't just sit there while your head bleeds. That wouldn't be good for the baby, and it certainly wouldn't be good for you.
Your boyfriend isn't a baby - he's a rational mature person. Yes, he may love you. But he is incapable of being someone you can trust, respect, honor and believe in. There are SO many situations in life where it is incredibly important that your chosen partner is someone that you can really believe in. What happens when you hit one of those situations and he abandons you? You owe it to yourself to have someone at your side that can be trusted. If children ever come into your life, THEY deserve to have a father that they can believe in 100%, that they can use as a role model, that they can rely on. This guy is not that person.
It's always hard to be on your own. And it's hard to leave someone you love. But loving someone and having them be GOOD for you and your family and your future are two completely different things. This guy may love you - and you love him! But you are not RIGHT for each other as a couple. If you stay, you will be continually betrayed and cheated on. Eventually he will leave you and move in with someone else, because that's what people who betray tend to do. So all of your faith and waiting and hoping will have resulted in you being alone - and perhaps in a FAR far worse situation than you are right now if you left now.
So be strong - for you, for your future. You deserve someone who can be relied on to stand by your side. It won't be easy, but nothing worth having in life is. This is your future we're talking about, and only you can do what is best for you.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com