how do i get over it?

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
hey, my boyfriend and i have been datin almost 2 years. we have broken up a few times because of stupid little things but one time we broke up for about 6 months but we still saw each other all the time, kissed, said i love you and basically acted like we were still together. during this time he went to 2 parties and was drinking. the first party he randomly had sex with another girl but he said it meant nothing and he and that girl don't talk anymore and he promised hed never hurt me again and all but then a couple months later he kissed another girl again he was drinking and apologized. Ive tried to get over it so many times but i am so self conscious anymore and i have a hard time letting it go. i have become so jealous and worried i dont know what to do! we have also had some problems with him talking to other girls online but that was all when we werent technically "together". its been about 6 months since all of that and weve been boyfriend and girlfriend for the last 4 months. the other day i found out that he had a girls phone number stored under a guys name and he told me he just didnt want me to get mad that he had a new girls number especially that girl but of course i was SO much more mad that he had been sneaky about it and he told me he never talked to her that she had texted him a few times but there was nothing going on. we fight a lot about little things but we have been best friends for 6 years now and we do love each other so much. I just don't know what to do or how to get over these things because when i bring them up i feel like i am ruining everything! i can see us staying together forever . . we just need to stop arguing and i need to find that trust 4 him again. what should i do!?

sorry it is so long :/ Advice
You will start trusting him and stop arguing so much once he acts trustworthy.

Right now you have too many burnt feelings to feel comfortable with him.

My advice is to do one of two things:

either ask him for a break until you feel good about him again;
or, drop your bad feelings and ignore the past. That is easy to say, but if you want to do it badly enough you will.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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