What do i do to get closer?
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Ok there's this girl from my sonic, were i work. I've known her for about a year now and have had loads of feelings for her. She's the only girl i really want to be with. Couple problems....she's a little more on the preppy/popular side...and im not so much. Ok, we've been seriously talking for about three weeks now, we've made out only once and little kisses here and there. During the first week of serious talking she told me that she didnt see us dating, that i was too nice for her, that she needed a challenge. Broke my heart like no other. I was going to just continue being her friend, but even though she hurt me i still wanna be with her so badly. This past week, we've been trying to hang out and spend some regular friend time with each other. But every time that time came she bailed by being to busy or claiming she was too drunk.
Then she tells me why she's been bailing on me so much. She tells me she doesnt want just another hook-up...she's tired of guys getting want they want and leaving. I completely agree with her. But that is not who i am. I really want to be with her with or without sex. That's not my goal in life, i'm not counting up how many different girls i can have sex with throughout my life. She afraid of getting cheated on. She would have to be afraid of that with me. But she's also afraid of cheating on someone else and hurting them....which the only reason that she cheats is because she drinks with other guys and so many party's - she has no clue what she's doing. She believe's deep inside her heart that she can't truely love any guy. She hates guys. I told her i was a guy and told her she must hate me, and she replies she could never hate me. So i dont know how to change her mind about this not ever loving someone and these other things. I need some advice on what to do please.
I'm guessing that all you are going to do is get hurt with this girl.
She's made it clear that she likes to party and hook up with guys. She says you are too good for her and not enough of a challenge.
She worries that she will cheat on you and hurt you.
Go ahead and give it a try with her and maybe she will change, but I doubt it and you are going to be sorry.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com