Can love coexist with weed placed first?

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I was in a discussion with my boyfriend of 9 months about his weed usage. He brought it up that my getting upset about it was beginning to annoy him. He is legally allowed to drink, so that's not a problem for me, since he doesn't go overboard with it. But after a long time I got down to just asking him if given the choice, would he give up smoking to stay with me. He said no. He will not stop until he does. I understand that and know it's unfair of me to push him into it. Not like I could. But I also asked after that if he loved me, and he said yes. Is that possible? Can you love someone and continue to do something that bothers and hurts them without any guilt at all? He said it's a problem that I don't want to do it because he wants it to be something he shares with his girl. A problem I don't want to do something illegal and harmful? It seems like every person I know smokes. I love this man. I care about him, which is why I hate seeing him do this to himself, even though he doesn't care. He is otherwise an intelligent, sweet person with much potential for his future. I've never had a relationship like this. Or for this long. I'm so afraid to lose him to this drug. Advice
It sounds like he is going to keep smoking no matter how you feel about it.

You may try bringing it up with him from time to time, but don't bug him too much unless you are willing to lose him.

Yes, people can keep doing bad things even though they love some one.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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