i don't understand him, and i know i'm doing wrong but it's like i can't help it.

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
okay this is going be very long. but i have a delima, i'll try and keep it as short as possible:) okay see i have loved before, and i've had my heart broken several times, and it seems everywhere i go it never seems to completely heal. well i was was getting over an ex of mine who i was hung up on for atleat 2 years, my bestfriend thought her boy's bestfriend would be good for me. well i met him and it wasn't love at first sight at least not for me. it seemed as if i was doing it just to make everyone happy and to not seem shallow. well i finally decieded this is what i can get why not make the best of it. as time went on i grew to really like this guy. well he told me when we first got together he was still hurting over his ex. but he felt like this realtionship would help him. well in the end he ended up cheated on me and broke my heart. i felt crushed used and i felt that love wasn't for me and i gave up it seemed. well as time went on we remained good friends, and still hung out. well about a month or so after we broke up we went to concert back and then on the way back we ended up messing around. this continued for about a week and i finally decied to ask him what the deal was. He told me he didn't know and that he did like but he still didn't want a realtionship. after this i decied to just be single and do whatever. well i ended up meeting a really nice guy who really liked me but because of the past with the other guy, i turned him down when he asked me out. but i soon felt bad and realized i can't do the same thing thats happeing to me since i knew the pain it brought. Well i felt i was finally over the other guy and stop hanging out with him so much because he was never home and i was always hanging with my new boyfriend. Now after i started dating this guy it, seemed my ex got real intersted in me real fast, and he didn't know about the other guy. he started to invite me places and asked my friends about me. well one night i went over to his place, and we were talking we got onto the converstation of when we broke up and he showed me a note i wrote him a few days after we broke up. he told me how horrible he felt and that he wishes he could do it all over again, we ended up doing things but this time it was diffrent, he smiled at me and was still all close to me even after we did what we did. now the problem is i failed to tell him i have a boyfriend, and i have told the other guy, which i know i can't have a stable realtionship now unless i come clean. and i'm afraid to tell the other guy how i still feel because, he keeps tell me he gets freaked out if a girl says they love him, and he's also going to the army soon, so i feel like i should stay with this other guy, because i know in my heart it wouldn't work. and i think i'm dilluting myself in thinking he still likes me let alone loves me, when the other guy plainly has stated he loves me many of times, i just really don't know wat to do -screw up.

RomanceClass.com Advice
Stick with the guy who says he loves you.

Tell everyone the truth and live with the outcome. That will be work best for you and everybody else. Make up your mind about what YOU want out of life and who will get you to that point.

Best wishes, George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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