She broke up with me 2 weeks ago and now she wants me back... what should i do !?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
We have dated for almost 12 months and she was my real love of my life. Im 25 and she is 19.We planned out our future in detailed right from the start, I mean getting marriad, kids and the whole nine yarts!She just finished school and this year she gona study at a colledge far away from me for 3 years.5 weeks before we broke up I sence a change in her and lead me think maybe she wasnt prepared for the long distance relationship and that she's gona break up with me before she leave for colledge.About 3 weeks ago I confronted her about how i feel about this and ended up in a fight.She told me that I was foolish and that she will never break up with me and she loves me with all of her heart.During that week she became completely distance towards me.Later that week she asked me to give her space to sort out her head.So I did.Two day of hell went pass and called me to sort things out.That same day she broke up with me telling me that she wants a single student life and she's not ready to settle down with me after colledge.But she still wants to be friends and the day when she's ready, she want to try it again.I told her that if this is what she wants then I will end this now forget about bein friends.Told her never to call me or write and leave me alone!She really tore me heart into pieces.I was a complete train wreck.She was my first true love and soulmate.I lost me virginity to her and i was her first.I believed in her and trusted her with all of my heart.Sure, all my friends, family and even her friends warned me about her!But i guess love can sometimes blinds one.I dont know...
Anyway, yesterday she sms me and asked me if I want to go for coffee with her because she wants to pour her heart out to me. I agreed and went for coffee with her later that day.
She told me that she still love me and she wants me back so badly and she will try everything to get me back.She really pour her heart out and I feel sorry for her.I told her that I still care about her and still have feelings for her.But I told her yesterday I need space and will let her know if im ready to try it again.I still love her but still angry at her for dumping me in the first place!She is still young and the way I feel now is that MAYBE she doesnt know what she really wants...? I dont know what to do!! Should I give her a second change ?!!? Apart me wants to but what if she change her mind again about me?!?! and can I trust her again?!? If we get back together, will i love her the same way I did?!!?! What should I do?!!?
You two are at different places in your life.
You are ready to settle down and have kids and she is ready to have fun in college. Right now she wants you back, but as you said who knows how long that will last?
A positive thing to do that will encourage your relationship would be for you to move near her college and perhaps live together. This would really be throwing caution to the winds but has a chance of succeeding.
Your other main choice is, of course, saying goodbye to her and start looking for someone new. My opinion is that she is not ready to survive a long separation from you.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com