I can't forget about him
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I've written in here a couple times but it seems the advice I am trying isn't working. To briefly fill in on the details my ex and I dated for about 5 years and were deeply in love. Now he is with a new girl that he has been with for about a month even though up until they started dating me and him were still acting like we were together. He would call me constantly and just bathed me in affection. He promised we'd still be best friends even though he has a new girlfriend, but he never calls me now, or writes me back to emails I send him. We hang out a couple times a week but only if I ask him to hang out. And he seems completely different, like cold and distant. I've tried talking to him about it, and also ignoring it and just being cheery and nothing changes anything.
I love him, but he thinks this new girl is amazing and says they are at the beginning of something "so great he can't even fathom". It hurts so much to hear this, I'm already taking antidepressants because I just can't handle this.
What can I possibly do, just keep hanging around hoping one day they'll break up? This seems almost like torture.
Thank you for the help!
It is like torture. It makes it even harder because you are closer to him than most ex's are with their ex's. Sometimes a clean break has something to say for it.
You should prepare to stay there for the long haul (unless you find a new love yourself.) He is still in the "honeymoon" stage with this new girlfriend and your influence on him is not going to be very strong.
Remember that he is very guilty right now and hanging out with you is making that guilt feeling even stronger.
Good advice for you is to be cheerful, look nice, and make him feel good. Don't be surprised if he wants to cut back to hanging out once a week or less. Hope for the best.
Good Luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com