Am i going to have to go for it?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I had this mgr at work who's always staring n smiling at me, flirts, makes me laugh, and talks about personal things. He hasnt had a g/f in 3yrs and his asst.mgr. said hes a loner n seems to have been hurt in the past.I think he might be interested b/c his friends come in and ask what i think of him and say hes such a great guy. One friend came in and asked me if my mgr. was a nice guy. When i looked at him puzzled, he said " ya know the one from...". When i inquired he said they dont really know each other that he's a friend of a friend. I told my mgr. about that guy and all he said was that the guy probably doesnt remember him, but they play pool together...which he clearly did know him.
His asst. also tried to hook us up too. He knew i was lonely n said "hes lonely too ya know" Wondering what he was suggesting he told me "its just hes single, says hes lonely n so r u, it seems like a good match. n i said what makes him think we like each other n he grins n says hes just making observations. he asked me once if id made my move yet, i said it wasnt my job. he said its the 90s,jokingly, girls can too. I think hes dropping hints to me about him but i also feel hes teasing me too because he does it all the time. But i think there may have been more to it since my mgr is so shy n they discuss me a lot. They tell each other a lot of what i tell them.
We never hung out outside of work, i invited him to a game once n he took the night off but he had to finish moving b/c his daughter was coming but said hed love to go if i got tickets again. i think he didnt want to make a move because i was moving away n he didnt really know how i felt. He didnt make an effort to say goodbye or get my contact info. the night i was to leave i said to hold his head up b/c i really believed n him. He hugged me and w/ his arms around me gave me a puzzled look and i was confused so he went blank after that. we said goodbye n he was grinning again n asked me what my plans were and where i was headed. I gave him my email n said to write me n let me know how things turn out for him. I havent heard from him since. He did ask a coworker if she had heard from me n he told her "i think she really liked me" n she said yeah she did". Then he said "i had kinda figured it out.." then asked how i was doing and what i was up to. I visited once but he had to change the schedule for his crew so we didnt get a chance to hang out n i didnt catch him at work before i left town. So im not sure if he wnted to see me. We tried to plan something but he wasnt at work when he told me to call, but he also said he was changing the schedule.
My question is that im moving back soon n need advice on what to do so any ideas on how he may feel or what i should do? Does it look like im the one who is going to have to make the move?
Yes, it is clear that you will have to make the move.
In fact, you have made several moves and it hasn't worked out.
So pin him down to a restaurant date or a bar date and get to know him better. If he is as shy as he seems, you may discover you don't like him very much.
But you should try.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com