Frustrated and confused

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I split with my ex a few months ago - we'd been together about 8 months, but have known each other and been friends for about 4 years. Before we got together she was in a couple of serious relationships, but we always had a strong connection and she even told me she liked me during them. We finally got together and things were great, but split because she said that she didn't feel things are right and she didn't feel like she wanted to feel (although she said she loved me). We have stayed in touch since we split and still speak a few times a week. She even says that nobody understands her like me and that she wishes things could've worked out. I'm just staying around to show I care (without actually saying it). But she seems quite clear that I don't make her feel a certain way. I know I should take her word for it, but I can't understand why she'd want to lose a relationship she'd thought about for 4 years with someone who is like a "soul mate" (her words)? And why does she keep calling???

Any thoughts? Advice
It sounds to me as if she likes you very, very much as a friend and companion, but not as a boyfriend.

You should take advantage of the situation and continue to be her soul mate and enjoy all the benefits that come with that.

What you have to lose are the physical benefits that come with being a b/f. But if you care about her enough you will be happy to be her friend. And, who knows, something may develop with her again down the road.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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