Am I over-reacting?
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Recently I have been acting and thinking differently. I am not entirely sure what has changed but I felt myself becoming more insecure even though my boyfriend did nothing to make me lose some trust in him.
I feared that he would dump me for another girl or end up cheating on me. In the past he has told me that he ended up cheating on one girlfriend [she seemed to totally ignore him and not want to be with him during the 8 months] but he said he learned from it and wouldn't do it again.
Recently I think I am starting to get over my trust issues but there is still one situation that just won't leave my mind.
During the night he kept recieving text messages on his phone. I would ask who it was and he just kept saying "a buddy from work" but wouldn't really tell me much. Being in the insecure mood I was, I decided to look at his text messages while he was asleep [I know it was a bad idea]. She had tried giving him some advice for how to make me come out of my mood. I found out they had hung out alone together, text messages each other every day and I think she seems to like him more than a friend.
We talked about this. He said she is just a friend and he is getting to know her. He won't leave me for her. But I just seem jealous because he will come home from work every day and text her. He uses up just about all of his time on his phone for her. I told him I find it annoying when he texts her a bunch of times when I am sitting alone with him. I just don't know what I should do.. I don't want to feel jealous but I am not sure how to.
If you feel jealous that's the way it is.
Jealousy hurts not only you but also your b/f. Continue to share your feelings of hurt with him and hopefully he will get the message.
It isn't fair for him to be causing you pain and you have every right to try to make him stop. Compromise will be part of the solution.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com