Handling an Angry Ex
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I got in a huge fight with this girl, who was my girlfriend up until a couple of weeks ago when we broke up. Now we dont talk as much anymore, and i said some really hurtful things to her the other night, and I finally got ahold of her online and told her I was sorry on an Instant Messenger. I asked her if I Could call her to wish her happy birthday, or ever call her. And she said no and was pretty upset.
She obviously is angry. And I said sorry about the way I acted. Should I just give her space? I love her and at the same time I know she doesnt love me so I am confused and I am not sure if i should just walk away now or not. She told me she is still in love with her ex. And I took that hard, but I always knew.
What should I do? Should I just call her anyways next week, eventhough she doesnt want me to, just to wish her happy birthday and leave it up to her after that point to call me?
It's a very important thing never to lash out at those you care about. It's an extremely important lesson in self control. People who love each other shouldn't yell and scream, because they care too much to do so. You lost control and now you're suffering because of it.
I would also never apologize on IM!! That says you only bother to type letters but not to talk in person. It is always FAR more important to say things to someone in person, face to face, to show you really care and mean it. So if you really want to show her you're sorry and really want to get back with her, go say it in PERSON so you can show how much she means to you. If the most effort you can muster is to type some letters on a keyboard, she's not going to put much faith in that.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com