I made a fool of myself

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female

I started seeing a guy for about 3 weeks when my ex decided he wanted me back and because I had so much history (3 yrs) and took up the opportunity because I still cared about him. Well when I was with him all I could do is think about this other guy. Two months later my ex and I broke up again - this time for good! A month or two later I called up the guy I was seeing before the ex - and we (the new guy and I ) started hanging out again, and again things were going great - well until he started getting distant. When we talk about it he says he is afraid i am not over my ex (BUT I AM) and doesnt want to get hurt again...I do see where he is coming from...not only this but he also has a friend who told him to do the same thing to me (leading me on and then dropping me), but he said he wouldn’t ever do that. SO this can be a combination of him dropping me and/or being afraid of getting hurt again. ANYWAY - I REALLY like this guy and want to be with him, part of me feels that I am in love with him (I know it sounds quick, but I did) and I told him that...now he won’t talk to me. And I am sure I made a fool of myself by calling him several times. I told him how I feel and that told him that I don't want my ex etc. What do I do at this point? I miss him VERY VERY much and I care about him deeply - I haven't ever felt like this before even with the ex of 3 yrs. I may have freaked him out or he is still afraid or he dropped me because he could. BUT is there anything I can do to get him to talk to me again? ANY advice will help! Thanks!

RomanceClass.com Advice
Unfortunately when you dumped him the first time it set up a big red flag in his mind.

If you can talk with him, continue to emphasize that you have no feelings for your ex and that you have very strong feelings for him. Tell him again that you regret breaking up with him earlier and that it was a mistake you won't make again.

Ask if you can talk with him once a week to see how he is doing (and to let him know you still care). Be upbeat and limit the call to 15 mins. Gradually you two may grow back together.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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