Jumping In when she Breaks Up
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
I have a lil bit of a problem, im a guy, and i like this girl, but she has a bf. I plan to ask her out when they break apart, which will prolly happen soon. But im worried, how will i know when she brakes up, and what if some other guy coems along first. I need to move fast, but i dont have a clue on waht to do. And i know a girl needs time and all, but for some reason, other guys dont wait long and succeed, so what do i do...
She definitely needs time! Sure, other guys may "leap on a girl" when they break up, but I have to tell you, in general those relationships are doomed to huge burn-out and failure. So even if that guy COULD have been really happy with her for a long time if he waited, he puts serious damage into the relationship by leaping into it. So the question is if you want to date her for 2 weeks and then be ditched because you were a "rebound guy", or if you care about her enough to give her time and then be her long-term boyfriend.
The key to any good relationship as I've said many times is being best friends. So what you can do right now AND during her rebound stage is to BE her best friend. Talk to her, share with her, listen to her, be there for her. That way she knows you care, but you're not treating her like a $50 bill that someone dropped. She should be treasured for being a special person that needs time to adjust - not treated like a piece of property that you have to "make yours".
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com