I'm jealous of my girlfriends ex
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I am 19 and i am in college currently. My girlfriend went to the same high school as me and sat at the same table and we barely noticed each other back then. In the summer after graduation we met and have been dating for about a year. She had a boyfriend in high school for about a year also whom she lost her virginity to. During high school i played around alot and i hooked up with approximately 20-25 girls without sleeping with any of them. I chose not to sleep with them because i wanted to lose my virginity to a girlfriend and this was not something i was interested in at the time. I lost my virginity to my girlfriend during about our second month of dating and eve since then i can't help my jealousy. I have narrowed what exactly i am jealous of down to a few things. I believe that i am jealous that i lost my virginity to her and her not to me. I think that it makes me react oddly when i think of her having intimate situations with her ex. I try my absolute hardest to not ever think of him but i can't stop thinking about it sometimes and i don't know what to do. This hasn't really effected our relationship but it does effect my relationship with her quite a bit. I want to be able to stop thinking about this and i have tried many things. Logically this should not be happening and my sister tells me that shince i'm a guy i shouldn't be worried about it but i can't help it.
Let her exist as the human being she is.
We all have pasts and none of us can claim to be perfect. You want her to be perfect for you, and she can be if you accept her as she is. Don't go looking for perfection in anybody because you will just be disappointed. Accept people as they are and how they might be. The past is just a blurry confusion of memories. Pick out the good memories and learn from the bad.
Imagine that in a year you have a different girlfriend and she is jealous of your past... how would you explain it to her?
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com