No Ambition! What should I do!?

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Okay, I've been dating my boyfriend for 8 months now, but it feels so much longer. I've had serious relationships before but not like this. I'm completely in love with him and I know it's the real thing. Everything about my boyfriend is perfect. I love the way we are together and I know he would do anything for me. There is only one problem. He has no ambition. He says he's going to do so many things- but never actually does them. I know he means well and probably does plan on doing them, but just doesnt. He is 20 years old and still lives with his parents. He hasn't had a job in the 8 months I've been with him, but he says it's because he is injured from a car wreck he was in in July. I love him so much but have to wonder what it will be like if I'm with him the rest of my life. I don't want to end up having to work to support him forever. Should I try talking to him about this? What should I do? Please help because I am so confused!
Thanks! Advice
His problem is not all that unusual.

I'm assuming he hasn't gone to college so the jobs available are entry level positions in dead end jobs like retail, short order cooking, warehouse work, etc.

You should talk with him about your concerns. Tell him he is perfect except for this one flaw but it is a very significant flaw. If nothing else he should be using his time to increase skills that are in demand such as keyboarding, using Microsoft Word, Excel, etc. Encourage him to keep regular hours (in other words not stay up real late and sleep in). Have him apply to temp agencies. Make it clear to him you will not support him.

Sometimes some loving nagging will bring things around. Give it a try.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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