Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
My fiance/girlfriend of 5 years cheated on me. She told me that she did and I give her credit for that. She went out with some friends and got "really drunk." She was there talking to this kid and everyone left and it was her and him and one thing led to another. She says that she didn't know what was going on because she was so drunk, and almost feels that she was violated. I guess I look at that as almost an excuse, but I could never in a million years see her doing that, so part of me wants to believe her. This happened 3 months before our wedding, and I don't know what to do. I can't picture my life without her because we have been together so long and I don't want to loose her. I asked her for details but she says she was so drunk that she does not remember and I guess if I hear exactly what happened I can have some closure to this issue, but at the same time I feel if I know that I will never be able to get over this. She seems almost as hurt as me, because she knows the potential consequences and embarrasement that this could cause, with telling everyone the wedding if off ect. I want to make things work but I am not sure if I can get past all of my anger. Please help me - any advice I would appreciate. Thanks.
Infidelity is one of the hardest of life's hurts.
Some relationships crumble immediately after and some get stronger.
It seems that you want to work to save your relationship but are having trouble with anger and jealousy.
My advice is to see a professional counselor as soon as possible.
S/he can help your work out your feelings before the fast approaching wedding and help direct you towards a solution which will reflect best your concerns.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com